I've always wondered what prune juice tastes like. I've never tried it. Never really had a desire to. But now I do.
Why?
I go to bed at 10 o'clock these days. I just can't keep my eyes open anymore. The byproduct of going to bed early is drinking prune juice, listening to some Sinatra, talking about the good 'ole days and driving slower.
I'm two for three folks.
This getting old business is foreign. Nice, at times, but very foreign. I love midnight oil. No, not the band. Well, actually, yes the band. Great band. Very underrated. But I do love midnight oil. I love to burn it. Correction. I loved to burn it. Now the match just burns down to my fingers because I have fallen asleep in the process of trying to light it.
My on the road lifestyle is catching up to me. I'm fighting it but it is winning. I can't stay up late anymore. I can't make it to the 11 o'clock news, let alone my main man Conan O'Brien.
"In the year 2000, 31-year-old men will fall asleep at 10 p.m. every night."
That's Armageddon, people. The gas shortage, the stock market crash, the horrendous options for president of this great nation? Puh-leez. That's nothing. This falling asleep early is the beginning of the end.
I'm off to Louisiana and Dallas for back-to-back weekends for week. How will I survive going to bed at nine p.m.? Oh, the humanity!
Dr. Pepper used to work. But caffeine doesn't have an effect anymore. That is a problem, right? I must be immune to it.
Does prune juice keep you awake? Just wondering.
3 comments:
Prune juice will just keep you regular. And I go to bed between 8 and 9 PM and I'm younger than you. Sad, sad, sad.
OK... even your good ole , oops or do I mean "old" mom and dad don't need prune juice just yet...for any reason!!! Hope it works!! Welcome to our side of 30......
You crack me up! By far your best post yet. I must say, I've been begging you for years to go to bed earlier with me and now you just go to bed before me? Can we find a happy medium babe?!
Love you anyways you old fart!
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